19th January 2009
Dear Myleene Klass,
I have been reading with some horror about the appalling way you were treated by the police. You were simply trying to protect yourself and your family within your own home – surely they can see that? So what if you waved a knife at the ‘intruder’ that you ‘saw at your window’? It’s not like you stabbed anyone or drowned a kitten or anything – they should totally just leave you alone.
And so what if it was your agent that leaked the whole story to The Sun? It’s the principle of the thing, isn’t it? Everyone should have the right to bear arms, particularly in their own home. That always makes me think of someone on a market stall shouting ‘Bear arms! Get your bear arms here, two for a fiver, nice and furry!’ which I know is a bit off topic, sorry. Back to you and your terrifying incident.
Isn’t it weird how there are always two sides to every story? Like how the police force have apparently said they didn’t tell you off at all and were all friendly and nice and that and worried for your safety but then they’re probably lying, yeah, stupid rozzers. Can’t trust them as far as you can throw them, can you? Oink oink, etc etc.
If you’re not to traumatised by the whole saga, please send me a signed photograph. Then I can look at your smily face and feel comforted in the knowledge that you’re out there somewhere with your mad knife skills ready to get all the baddies.
Yours sincerely,
Lucy Knight
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What Klass doesn’t seem to know, or care about, is the fact the ‘burglars’ were Noel and Danny who’ve been sleeping in her shed for the last 5 years